On Air with Ryan Seacrest 2009-02-10

Tuesday

The show started with a look at Kate Winslet’s backside, which she’s apparently just learned to love even though she’s shown it off often enough. Ryan had it right when he said “we’ve given you so many details that don’t make sense, you have to listen to that story!”

It’s quite surreal:

Ryan: Kate Winslet has had a long and tumultuous relationship with her aaaah… rear.

Ellen: Yeah, her voluptuous bottom, as she calls it. And she’s said she was a fat teen, and didn’t like her bottom then, but now she has to do the nude scenes in The Reader, and that is the movie she’s Oscar nominated for, she said she even loves how big, round, voluptuous and blemished it is, and she wants to … {at this point they seem to be losing it}

Ryan: Do you realise what your job is right now? You’re describing Kate Winslet’s rear end. Anyway, what’s the deal?

Ellen: She will never give up fish and chips, that’s her Saturday night family dinner.

Ryan: Alright! That’s an exclusive friends.

So, let me get this straight. Kate Winslet’s got a lardy arse because she’s eating fish and chips every week, but she doesn’t care because she’s not the one who has to look at it? Hmmm, sounds better the way Ellen tells it!

After getting off to a light-hearted start, they switched to the serious news about Chris Brown and Rihanna and information from eye witnesses that had come to light since yesterday. Ryan was really shocked about the whole thing as he knows both Chris Brown and Rihanna and both he and Ellen had been trying to find the facts amongst all the rumour and speculation. Ryan spoke to Ken Baker from E! who explained that the police found Rihanna on her own and hysterical in a rented Lamborghini. Chris Brown had fled the scene on foot, taking the car keys with him. She was taken to ER with bruising to her face and bite marks on her arms, but she’s now out of the hospital, having snuck by the media, but there’s still no comment from Chris Brown.

While I’m listening to this, I notice on Twitter that Kanye West has arrived in Ryan’s studio (on time, which seems to surprise Ryan’s producers), so I guess we’ll get some of that interview on the three-hour show tomorrow.

A great teaser from Ryan for Andy Samberg: “his biggest achievement in his career may have been getting Justin Timberlake to put on a leotard and heels”. The Andy Samberg interview is available on podcast and if nothing else, you should listen to his description of the schedule for Saturday Night Live from pitch through to party, find out what struck a nerve, and listen to what he’s doing to prepare for playing the gay younger brother in “I Love You, Man” — he sounds like a funny guy.

In the next bit of sleaze, Ryan wasn’t buying that Sienna Miller would get sacked from playing Maid Marion just for being too pretty when the make-up artists could just make her uglier. Then he said, “I mean, look at me this hour. Look at me next hour. I could get fired from this job at any minute!” That’s just silly. Ryan’s not going to get fired for being too pretty … that was what he meant, right ;-) I think the directors have been listening to Ryan’s radio show, and they’ve given up the make-up because of the recession and that’s why they need a naturally ugly Maid Marion.

Also in the sleaze was the story that Orlando Bloom has gone to Australia for a week’s vacation over Valentine’s weekend, and there’s speculation that he has taken a ring for his girlfriend Miranda Kerr. Ryan’s best offer for Valentine’s day is a dinner date with Ellen DeGeneres and Portia, which he thought would just emphasize his singleton status: “there’s not a more obvious couple I could be out with that would say ‘hey, I’m single and have no plans on Valentine’s day’ than Ellen DeGeneres and Portia. Anyway… that’s your sleaze story, and I’m ordering in Saturday.” There’s no way Ryan is single through anything other than choice, so I’m really lacking in sympathy! He’s gorgeous and has the personality to match, so it can only be his own fault if he’s having dinner for one ;-)

Talking of people who really don’t need to be single if they don’t want to (and looking at the Twilighters’ fury at Ryan for saying Rob Pattinson has no personality), I was amused to read Rob Pattinson’s story about inviting his ‘stalker fan’ out for dinner because he was lonely while filming in Spain last year. Apparently he bored her so much that she didn’t come back. Smooth!

On this show, Ryan and Ellen were talking about germs again. I’m so with Ryan on worrying about handling salt and pepper shakers and other things that are shared in public places! I refused to eat in restaurants as a child because of the germs, but I grew out of that, fortunately. But I still don’t touch the salt and pepper shakers, and I do go wash my hands between touching the menu and the food arriving …carefully avoiding contact with door handles ;-) I try not to think about what’s going on in the kitchens. As for hotel rooms, or rented holiday apartments, first thing you do when you arrive is clean everything you might touch, right? Right? Honestly, the rubber suit sounds good and if I thought I could get away with it… BUT, this is where I hit a problem with Ryan … remember him talking about the five second rule on the show a while back? Nobody who has a five (or however many) second rule when it comes to food that lands on the floor can worry too much about germs. Disqualified. If you eat off the floor, you might as well just go ahead and enjoy those germs off door handles too.

The section on Girl Scout Cookies was far more to my taste. This tradition isn’t something I know about, but I think these thin mint cookies are something I need to investigate to, erm, satisfy my cultural enrichment urges (which, oddly, seem to be controlled by my taste buds). I wonder if they ship overseas.

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