New Moon reading: Bella needs Jacob
The scene is set, the candle is trying to burn Ryan’s arm, the music is playing (following a nudge from Ellen), and it’s time for another touching and not-even-slightly-overacted performance from Ryan. Ryan’s interaction with Jacob in this video is so convincing that I actually thought he was Bella for a moment, and the shot of Edward all alone is hilarious makes his absence from Bella’s life so much more amusing poignant.
How much I wished that Jacob Black had been born my brother, my flesh-and-blood brother, so that I would have some legitimate claim on him that still left me free of any blame now. Heaven knows I had never wanted to use Jacob, but I couldn’t help but interpret the guilt I felt now to mean that I had. Even more, I had never meant to love him. One thing I truly knew—knew it in the pit of my stomach, in the center of my bones, knew it from the crown of my head to the soles of my feet, knew it deep in my empty chest—was how love gave someone the power to break you. I’d been broken beyond repair. But I needed Jacob now, needed him like a drug. I’d used him as a crutch for too long, and I was in deeper than I’d planned to go with anyone again. Now I couldn’t bear for him to be hurt, and I couldn’t keep from hurting him, either. He thought time and patience would change me, and, though I knew he was dead wrong, I also knew that I would let him try. He was my best friend. I would always love him, and it would never, ever be enough.
Meyer, S. (2006) New Moon. Atom. pp 218-219
